


Speak Your Mind

by junkieboyfriend



Category: Trainspotting (Movies), Trainspotting Series - Irvine Welsh
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Play, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drinking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Marijuana, Snogging, Virginity Kink, mark pov, phonetic Scottish, speak yer mind mark, ye gonnae wake yer ma!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-19
Updated: 2020-06-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:48:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24813325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/junkieboyfriend/pseuds/junkieboyfriend
Summary: Simon an’ Ah goat in a fight an’ Ah stormed oaf from ‘em. Ah told ‘em where ‘eh could shove his ego before I made mah exit.
Relationships: Mark "Rent Boy" Renton/Simon "Sick Boy" Williamson
Comments: 1
Kudos: 23





	Speak Your Mind

Simon an’ Ah goat in a fight an’ Ah stormed oaf from ‘em. Ah told ‘em where ‘eh could shove his ego before I made mah exit. 

When I goat home he wis own oor bed waitin’ fer us. He’s holding a bottle of vodka as a peace-offering. I wannae tell em where eh can shove it. Ah ask ‘em whit he thinks he’s daein’ here an’ he says he’s tryin’ tae apologize ‘cause we’re mates an’ aw. I gie him a look. Things havenae been thae same ‘tween us since a few nights back when we first snogged. ‘Er mibbe things were nae sae good prior tae thit but thae kiss made us wise tae it. I dunnae ken. I wannae throw ‘em oot but a cannae, he’s a mate. Mah bezzy mate. 

Thae kiss was sae fresh in oor brain, makin’ things a wee bit tense. 

****

Thit night wis cold as aw baws ootside, Si an’ I were walkin’ back tae mah place. We were both pished an’ Ah needed tae break in an alley, Sick Boy just lit a cigarette an’ waited fer us tae stabilize oorsel. He watched us, his eyes odd lookin’ in thae darkness ‘aye thae night. His eyes were aw dilated ‘n thit as they raked ower us. Ah crossed mah airms at ‘im, lookin’ away.

Suddenly Ah’m caught off guard an’ Ah’m slippin’ doon thae side ‘a thae wall. Si’s ower tae us quick, liftin’ us back up an’ huffin’ ‘a us.

“Christ, Rents.” he huffed oot in exacerbation  
I gie him a weak smile, “Ah am pished, Si.” 

Simon an’ I lock eyes, oor gazes intertwinin’. Ah can see his breath an’ I can feel it oan mah ain face. He can probably feel mah breath too; Ah ken he’s seein’ it. Sick Boy’s movements were quick, catchin’ me off guard; he caught us behind thae neck wih yin hand, his other hand graspin’ mah cheek as he snogs us quickly. I gasped at thae sudden affection an’ Sick Boy wis quick tae pull away from us. 

“Aye, uh, Sorry.” He fumbled, turnin’ away as if nothin’ jus’ occurred. 

****

Things havnae been thae same since.

Now here thae cunt wis, oan mah bed wih ‘a bottle ‘a vodka, askin’ us tae fergive ‘em. Ah sighed, knowin’ oor fight was petty an’ senseless; it really wis jus’ me bein’ passive aggressive aboot thae other night. 

Ah flopped next tae ‘em oan thae bed an’ took thae vodka from ‘is grasp. Sick Boy grinned at us as we drank from thae bottle. He ken this wis a sign ‘aye ‘a truce. 

“Ah dinnae mean tae be a cunt, Si. Ah’m jus’-.”

Ah wondered if Ah should bring it up. Kin I even talk aboot this? Would Si even remember snoggin’ us oan a night like thit? I wis tired though, tired ‘a pretendin’ everythin’ wis jus’ peachy. Sick Boy was watchin’ us expectantly, waitin’ fer an explanation of ma cunty behavior recently.

“Ah’m still freaked from thae other night.” Mibbe it was thae wrong wordin’, but it wis close enough  
Sick Boy cocked his heid, “Whit night?” He sounded guilty as aw fuck.  
Ah gih him a look, “Ye ken which night, Si.”

Sick boy nodded as he returned mah gaze.

“Right, aye, thit yin.” He scratched behind his neck nervously, “I didnae mean-...” He stopped

Simon didnae ken how tae excuse his actions, it wis very clear tae me. He wis flushed, obviously embarrassed. 

I couldnae meet his gaze at thae moment, instead I git tae work oan the vodka bottle. Ah put oan a record tae alleviate thae silent tension ‘aye the room. Si leans back against ma headboard, Ah kin feel his eyes oan us. I shake ma heid at ‘em, goin’ intae ma drawers fer some hash. Hash always seemed tae alleviate the deep anxieties that lay within us, Ah miracle as far as Ah’m concerned. 

Ah took a deep inhale, our head goin’ back as I slowly turn tae finally meet Si’s look. Sick Boy wis cockin’ an’ eyebrow at us, airms crossed, face cool an’ calculated. Ah gave ‘em a wee grin, he wis all worked up an’ fer what? Simon leaned forward, unfoldin’ himsel jus’ a wee bit.

“Aye let us have a hit ‘a it?” He inquired shyly  
Ah huffed at him, grinnin’ as we pass it tae him, “Ye wish ye could have aye hit ‘a it” the innuendo slippin’ from ma lips before Ah could stop it.

Sick Boy had already taken thae joint before Ah let this slip; sae ‘is coughin’ oan exhale wis a bit strained an’ panicked ‘cause ‘a us. His eyes were wide as he looked at us wih shock, holdin’ his chest. He obviously wanted a word but Ah did enjoy watchin’ ‘em cough an’ sputter. 

“Rents, whit thae hell ‘re ye oan aboot?” Sick Boy asked defensively

In ma high state, however, I couldnae be arsed tae take ‘em seriously. Ah giggled at the blond cunt, grippin’ the bed sheets tae insure Ah wis no gonnae fall... Again. 

Ah wis gonnae take thae piss, “Aye, Si, thair’s nae shame in it.”  
“Nae shame in what?” He wis glaring daggers at us  
I couldnae stop thae burst ‘a laughter I let oot aftir sayin’, “Loads ‘a cunts fuck bloaks up their arse, mate.” 

Sick Boy’s eyes widened an’ Ah wis cacklin’, pure fuckin’ comedy gold! Simon’s face couldnae be anymair priceless. Ah gripped ma sides as I looked at ‘em through ma squinted vision. I’d done somethin’ similar tae Begbie before, but thit cunt’s sae sensitive ‘e threatened tae take mah baws, an’ useful ‘er no I’d like tae keep ‘em. Si wis no like Begbie, he jus’ glared at us in judgement. Awways judgin’ us. How kin he judge us? He has no been tae law school! Ah huff at him fer bein’ stuffy.

“Sorry, Rents, Ah’m oanly aftir fanny, ye kin.” Simon replied  
I sneered at ‘em, “Eh, why’re ye apologizin’ fer? Like Ah’d be interested.”

Well mibbe…

Si stuck his tongue oot at us, “See mah splendid appendage ye might be, buftie boy.”  
“Ye must’ve drank tae much ‘a this voddy, Si.” Ah shook mah heid

He snorted a wee bit, an unattractive attribute ‘a his which he felt comfortable enough tae share wih us. It touched us. Aye, Ah sound like a right poof.

“Well who else gonnae fuckin’ drink it if no mwah?”  
“Wasnae it oor peace-offerin’?”

I was lookin’ at thae over half-empty bottle ‘a Voddy, Ah’d oanly had a wee bit, mostly smokin’ hash. Ah sighed. Shitty peace-offerin’ from a shitty mate. Si shrugged at us, smilin’ like a cunt. 

“Thoat thit counts.” He pointed to his head, “Ishn’t that right Mrsh.Moneypenny?”  
Ah sighed, “Dunnae start wih thit Sean Connery shite, Si.”  
“Sean Connery’s a lady's man. He git’s shite done, he’s goat charisma, Rents.”  
I waved my hand dismissively, “Ah git it, ye wannae shag Sean Connery.”

Sick Boy narrowed ‘is eyes at us; starin’ intae mah soul wih great disapproval. His lips were pursed as he crossed his airms at us, lookin’ defeated an’ angry. Well it wisnae a no.

Ah wondered how long he’d stay aroond, usually he departed shortly after seein’ us tae go get a bird. It made us bitter, how much he neglected us these days. 

“How long ye steyin’?” Ah asked, sittin’ cross from ‘em  
He huffed, “Want us tae leave sae soon?”  
I shrugged, “Thoat ye might have a date ‘er somethin’.”  
Sick Boy shook his heid, “Ah’m takin’ thae night oaf.”

There wis a moment ‘a pure silence before he looked up at us from the bed, scratchin’ thae back ‘a his neck. 

“Wis wonderin’ if Ah could stay thae night.” Si remarked

Ma chest felt odd when Ah’d processed the words; Simon hadn’t slept in ma room since we were wee. Ah wondered where he planned oan sleepin’, but it did make us nostalgic. I smiled, the sensation feeling odd oan ma face an’ in my torso.

“Aye, Si, wouldnae mind.” I replied, ma voice oddly soft

Si looked ower at thae TV an’ saw some old cartoon playin’, yin we boath recognized. He grinned at thae familiar sounds an’ sights. It wis odd tae see such a genuine smile oan his face; it wis oddly attractive. Stop it, Renton, dinnae think thit.

“Jus’ like old times.” He remarked quietly, nae noticin’ me starin’ at ‘em.

Ah smiled a wee bit, rememberin’ those old times. Things were sae much simpler.

“Aye.” Ah nodded, gazin’ at Sick Boy an’ nervously huffin’ whin his eyes met mine.

****

It wis later now, everyyin here wis fast asleep, except us. Sick Boy had curled up in ma bed, sayin’ he didnae care an’ he wisnae sleepin’ oan thae flair. He had ‘is back tae us, curled in a fetal position towards thae wall. Ah wis sittin oan thae edge ‘a thae bed, ma ain’ back tae ‘em, hunched ower in thought. All Ah could dae wis think, think aboot Simon, Sick Boy, ma ain’ bottled up emotions which Ah refuse tae indulge. But Ah need tae talk tae someyin, anyyin. 

“Si?” I called quietly, “You awake?”  
Ah hear a wee huff, “Aye, Rents. Cannae sleep, neither.” 

Ah sighed in relief thit Ah wis no thae oanly yin struggling. Ah wanted tae talk aboot it, Ah needed tae. I wis tryin’ sae hard tae bottle it up, fergit thae shit. But it wis no use, all Ah kin think aboot is Simon, thit night, thae kiss. Ah had tae tell ‘em, Ah had tae.

“Si, Ah know ye dinnae wannae talk aboot it…” Ah started.

But then Ah felt thae shame, thae burning oan ma cheeks, thae pain in ma chest. Tears bubbled in ma eyes an’ Ah felt like a right proofty, cryin’ like this. I sniffled audibly, an’ felt Si move behind me. When Ah turned Ah see he’s sittin’ up, lookin’ at us. He looked oddly concerned, Ah’d never seen it before. I turned away from him, no wantin’ him tae see me cry. See me sae weak.

“But Ah cannae stoap thinkin’ aboot it. Ah.. Ah ken ye didnae mean tae but-”

I paused, gaspin’ fer words tae say, as ma tears fell doon ma face. Ah felt Simon’s wairm hand oan ma shoulder, an I bowed my heid in embarrassment. Whit must he think ‘a me? Whit a fuckin’ joke Ah must be.

“Rents.” He spoke almost softly tae us  
I hugged myself tightly, “Ah dinnae whit it all means, Si, Ah just-”

Once again Ah wis strugglin’ wih what Ah wanted tae say. It seemed impossible tae get anythin’ oot. Why couldnae Ah open up? Sick Boy rubbed oor back comfortinly, tryin’ ‘is best tae comfort me when he didnae ken how.

“‘S okey Rents.” He cooed almost wairmly  
Ah took a deep breath, Ah think Ah knew whit Ah wanted tae say, “Ah wannae kiss ye again.” 

Thae words felt like they were spillin’ from ma lips as soon as ma brain thought them up. Simon gasped, his hand stoppin’ it’s movements. Ah covered ma face wih ma hands, embarrassed as all shite. But fuck, Ah’d said it.

Sick Boy’s hand went tae ma airm, tryin’ tae move oor hands away. Ah looked ower at him, sittin’ behind us oan his knees. He quickly met ma gaze, he looked at us wih a deep emotion thit I wis unaware existed, as it shook ma heart an’ made ma lungs feel like they were gonnae deflate.

“Mark, ye… Ye’re no jokin’?” He inquired,  
Ah shook ma heid, a wisnae gonnae pretend anymair, “No, I wisnae. I-... I liked it.”

Simon bit his bottom lips slowly as he gazed at us, he didnae say nowt tae us. Sick Boy came in closer, sittin’ oan his knees beside us as he lightly touched ma cheek again. It felt like thae same spot as before, oanly this time he didnae trap me; he didnae grab thae back ‘a oor neck. He ken, he didnae need tae. Oor lips were inches apart now, Ah felt mah heart goin’ fast in ma chest. Ah wondered if Ah’d remember ‘is taste, Ah wondered if he’d let us touch ‘em this time.

“I liked it tae.” Sick Boy whispered

Ah shivered as he leaned in tae kiss us. Ah remembered. He wis sweet, masculine, an’ had a hint ‘aye voddy an’ a cigarette oan his breath. Wonderful. Ah couldnae taste it enough. This time he gave us thae chance tae kiss back an’ kiss back Ah did. Ah responded eagerly tae his lips, his scent, his taste, an’ even thae light touch ‘eh gave against ma cheek. I groaned as his tongue met ma ain’, his much more experienced an’ workin’ us ower even if Ah did gih ‘em a good fight.

When he pulls away Ah came back tae reality, realizin’ Ah’m oan ma back an’ Simon wis between oor legs. Ah hudnae even realized he’d put us in this position, but Ah felt oddly safe. Sick Boy looked doon at us, pantin’ an’ strokin’ ma cheek wih his thumb. It wis an oddly affectionate display, Ah didnae mind but it wis odd fer someyin like Simon.

“Mark.” He whispered, “Dae ye still wan’ us, now?”  
Even aftir Simon had indulged us, Ah did want mair, “Aye. Ah dae wan mair, Si.” Ah blushed a wee bit  
“Fuck, Renton, whit ye wan us tae dae? Fuck ye?” 

Ah ken it wis rhetorical, he wisnae actually expectin’ an answer to that. But ma hips bucked against ‘em at thae mention ‘a it. Mibbe Ah did. Ah bit ma lip, lookin’ off shyly.

“‘S thit an offer?” Ah inquired,  
Sick Boy’s eyes widened, “Renton!” He whisper-cried, coverin’ his mouth in surprise at us

Ma blush darkened as I felt butterflies in my stomach. Did Ah really just ask Simon, ma bezzy mate, tae shag us?

“Have ye ever-?” Sick Boy asked, thae rest ‘a thae sentence implied  
Ah shook ma heid, “No, Ah huvnae.”  
Simon closed his eyes and hummed, “Fuck thit’s hot, okey.” He sighed

Ah chuckled at ‘em an’ he began tae yank oaf ma pajama pants an’ find no boxers beneath ‘em. Sick Boy grinned at us, as if callin’ us a whore wih his eyes; Ah jus’ replied wih a shy grin. Simon spat in his hand an’ grabbed us, causin’ us tae let oot a light gasp. Ah hudnae been touched thair in a long while; Ah didnae like daein’ it maself. Si felt braw though, he had an oddly useful technique he used wih his wrist. Hard tae explain an’ it made us even harder. 

When Ah look doon, Simon is suckin’ oan his fingers an’ gihin’ us a predatory look; it scared us but also aroused us. Soon Sick Boy was rubbing ‘is middle finger against ma arsehole, Ah shiver at thae foreign touch.

“Anyyin ever touch ye here before?” He inquired, ‘is voice low an’ husky  
Ah bit lightly at ma hand in nervousness, “No, Ah’ve never been touched thair.” 

I could feel ma legs trembling, he’d hardly touched us an’ Ah wis nearly fallin’ apart. Simon looked like he’d never heard anythin’ mair pleasin’ in his life an’ a weird part ay us wants tae please ‘em. 

Sick Boy’s finger toyed with penetratin’ us but never fully committin’ tae it, watchin’ ma face as I writhe fer it. 

“C’mon, Rents, yer ma raised ye better ‘an thit, whair’s yer manners?” Sick Boy teased smugly  
I recognized this game, “Please, Si.” I gasped

He wis pleased wih ma ability tae catch oan, sinking his finger intae us. I gasped an’ looked up at Simon.

“Anythin’ fer a mate.” He grinned deviously.

Sick Boy’s singular finger wis soon joined by two mair, stretchin’ us oot mair than Ah thoat Ah ever could. Simon was thoroughly enjoyin’ the display I was makin’ ‘ay maself. 

He grinned at us leanin doon, “Ye‘re gonnae wake yer maw, Rents.” He warned  
“Tell her ‘s ma withdrawals.” I teased  
Sick Boy smacked oor leg an’ chuckled, “Shuddup.”

He curled his fingers an’ I had nae choice but tae buck up an’ moan. Ma fingers were clawin’ at thae bed an’ ma toes were curlin’ somethin’ fearsome. He grinned when he realized he’d done it. 

“Rents, feel thit? Ah hit yer spot.” He stated smugly, curlin’ his fingers once again an’ pressin’ up even harder oan it. 

I cried out, covering ma mooth wih ma ain hand as pleasure wracked it’s way through us. 

“Fuckin’ ‘ell.” Ah wheezed as Ah wis allowed tae breathe again. 

Sick Boy chuckled at us an’ withdrew his hand, Ah gasped at feelin’ so horribly empty. Ye never really ken wit ye’ve goat ‘til ye’ve no goat it anymair. Simon dug in his pockits fer a mom’ before returnin’ tae us wih a package ‘ay lube. 

“Ye dun want us tae use spit fir this, Ah promise.” Simon remarked.

I nodded quickly, watchin’ Simon shed his shirt, then his pants, an’ finally his keks. I bit ma lip as I gazed at it, Sick Boy’s cock - which wis indeed somethin’ I’d prefer mair lubricant fer. He grinned at us, strokin’ thae lube ontae his cock almost casually. Aftir he assumed it tae be enough, he grabbed oor leg an’ yanked us intae position. Ah obediently complied, Ah ken he knows a loat mair than Ah dae. So Ah gih him ma legs tae sling o’er his shouldirs. 

Simon looked oddly pleasin’ like this. It wis like he belonged here, ‘tween ma legs wih a lubricated erection teasin’ ma hole. He looked proper at home here. Sick Boy rested the head against oor entrance, lookin’ up at us wih his blown pupils. Ah’d never felt sae attracted tae anyyin in ma life.

“Ye want it?” Simon inquired politely  
Ah wis fallin’ apart wih need, noddin’ furiously, “Aye!”  
“Mark, yer manners?” Sick Boy reminded us, tauntin’ us, usin’ ma real name  
“Please, Simon.” Ah begged delicately, usin’ his name against ‘em in retaliation

Simon put us oan ma stomach, arse in the air as he rubbed against ma entrance. Then I felt it, thae breach. He wis pushin intae us slowly, stretchin’ us oot an’ fillin’ us up. Ma mooth dropped open in shock at thae new feelin’ burnin’ it’s way through us. It burned somethin’ fearsome an’ he was sae fuckin’ big, Ah felt small tears startin’ tae form in oor eyes. Simon could feel oor tremblin’ when he’d penetrated us tae the hilt, nah mair cock an’ thank god fer thit. Ah wis jist aboot dyin’ oan thae amount he did have. 

“Mark, ye’re daein’ sae good. Just breathe.” Sick Boy whispered encouraginly, kissin’ ma shouldir. 

I stayed deathly still, just focusin’ oan breathin’. After a few moments thae burnin’ seemed tae be subsidin’ significantly. I wis still shakin’ a bit from the stretch but I think I wis ready. 

I nodded, “Okey Si, move.” 

Simon silently kissed oor shouldir again an’ slowly rocked his hips intae us. I wis sae full it felt odd in ma stomach but I wanted ‘em tae move mair. I shoved ma hips back against him tae display ma wants an’ Sick Boy chuckled. He grabbed oor hips an’ began tae pick up his pace, Ah wis beginnin’ tae pant an’ moan as he penetrated us. It felt sae good, sae right, Ah’d never felt happier. 

“Shite, Simon, thit’s fuckin’ braw.” Ah couldnae stop thae compliment, it spilled oot ma mooth the moment it entered ma brain.  
I heard ‘em breathe oot an almost inaudible, “Thanks.” As he continued tae pick up his pace.

Soon he wis fuckin’ intae us harshly, thae sound ‘a thae slap ‘ay oor skin wis fillin’ the room. Sick Boy nipped at oor neck an’ I’d never felt mair taken care of. Jist when I thought this wis it, this wis as good as it goat, he hit it. Dead oan. 

I wis archin’ ma back, curlin’ ma toes, bitin’ yin hand an’ usin’ thae other tae fist thae sheets. Sick Boy hit oor prostate again; this wis a hit ‘ay it’s ain. Simon knew whit he’d done tae us an’ was nippin’ at oor neck again, suckin’ at ma sensitive neck. He whacked oor ass harshly an’, tae ma ain surprise, Ah moaned in response. 

“Mark, ye wee whoore. Ah’ve never seen someyin take cock this good their first time.”  
I managed out a breathless, “Thank you.” ‘Lest I be reminded ‘ay ma manners again. 

He began strokin’ us in time wih his ruttin’, makin’ us squeal like a wee bird. I wis daein’ a number on oor hand, bite marks all o’er it, but I couldnae help it. Simon wis tae good at this. 

“Ye’re a natural, Rents.” He complimented

Ah had reason tae believe Simon wis mair of a natural than Ah wis, but how could Ah argue when Ah wis sae full ‘a joy an’ cock. 

Simon wis pickin’ up an even harsher pace now, makin’ oor bed hit up against thae wall an’ diggin’ his nails intae oor hips. Ah couldnae gih a fuck less aboot any a thit though, Ah just wanted Simon’s cock however he planned tae gih tae us. I felt thae knot beginnin’ tae form though, thit knot that said I wis gonnae cum soon. My legs shook furiously as thae knot goat tighter an’ tighter. Ah wis bitin’ harshly intae ma hand now tae stoap thae noises but I wis still pantin’ like fuck. Sick Boy was gruntin’ an’ growlin’ against ma neck like a beast, fuckin’ intae us wih pure feirocity. 

Ah felt it comin’ oan, Ah couldnae believe this wis happenin’. Ah couldnae believe whit I wis gonnae dae.

“Simon! I’m gonnae cum!” I nearly whimpered, fightin’ ma urges tae cry oot like a whore  
“Dae it, Mark. Fuckin’ cum fer us.” Simon almost demanded, yin hand goin’ tae grab oor throat. 

Sick Boy sunk his fingers intae ma open mouth as I cried oot helplessly, cummin’ like I’d never cum in ma entire fuckin’ life. Ma entire body shook wih pleasure as I almost saw fuckin’ stars. I felt Simon ruttin’ intae us a few mair times before he buried himself deep inside us, shootin’ oaf a heafty load. I let oot a broken noise ‘ay happiness at thae wairmth.

When he pulled oot Ah felt maself tae be leakin’, but before Ah could go anywhere Sick Boy laid doon, slingin’ an arm o’er us, draggin’ us tae him. Ah let Simon guide us tae lay oan his hairy chest an’ sighed contently. 

Mibbe I should speak ma mind mair often.


End file.
